Sane love is no love – this was the popular saying, but Carol wasn’t so sure. The kind of “love” her aunt had for her was insane! Totally unneeded.

She had to rush to a meeting but her body was hardly agreeing to be smart, neither was her brain. Reason? Her aunt!

Aunty Sewa had come into her room at 1 am, one-friggin-a-m! Carol had thought something had happened, maybe people had forcefully entered the house to rob them, or worse; but no, the only thing being attacked was her forehead by Aunt Sewa.

“rebobosintabaya… kakamarakakayabasendaya…”

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That was Aunty Sewa reeling out special tongues on her forehead, blessing her with occasional showers of spittle and onion breath from the suya they’d had last night.

“Aunty Sewa, stop na! Ahan what is all these?!”

“The pastor said I must do this for you at 1 am. Karo, stop resisting! Anyway, I know it is not you resisting… it is the spirit husband! I cast…”

At that point, I had had enough! Spirit husband kwa! “Aunty, so this pastor didn’t think all that anointing oil you rubbed on my head last week isn’t enough to ward off this spirit husband? You must disrupt my sleep too?”

“Which pastor? Ohhh… no not that one, that one wasn’t seeing clearly… I knew there was more to it, this new pastor said it is spirit husband… and there might even be more than one of them.”

Wawu.

Carol didn’t know whether to be shocked that her aunt had found yet another “pastor”, or the fact that this new one has now put it in her head that spirit husbands were the problem.

No wonder, all that thick speaking in tongues.

“But aunty, you realise I go to a bible-teaching, bible-believing church, yeah? And if I have several husbands in the spirit, my pastor would have sensed something?”

“Iro o, I don’t think your pastor’s gifts extends to sensing spirit husbands. See ehn, this new pastor, o gbona gan!”

Carol looked at the time. A whole forty-five minutes had passed.

“Aunty please go back to bed. I have a meeting this morning and I need to rest to stay sharp through it.”

Her aunt looked at her like the devil himself had possessed her. “No don’t worry, sleep, I’ll just sit in the chair over there and continue praying…”

Carol thought she was kidding, but she wasn’t – her aunt walked over to the chair in the corner, sat down and started to pray silently, shaking her head with very passionate fervour.

She could still hear her aunt’s quiet prayers in her head and the speaking in tongues as she arrived at the reception of the office the meeting was holding.

“Yeah, hi. Good morning, I’m here to see the spirit husband.”

Oops. Aunty Sewa definitely will be the end of her.

Ah. O ga o.

***

Read Part 1 here

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