The people from her father’s family were at it again. They were not just her village people, they were her village people that lived in the city. Matter of fact, they resided right there in her father’s house, where she has come to feel like a stranger.

“Carol, take this òróró, Pastor said everything we want will come to us if we rub it on our foreheads.”

Her aunt who had become an expert in jumping from one church to the other, had perfected the art of calling her name in the most Yorubaic way ever – Karó.

“Aunty I have everything I need, Ma. But thank you.” She faked a smile as she pushed the bottle of oil back to her aunt.

Carol paused her typing and looked up from her phone at her aunt… Had this woman not heard her? She thought. “Aunty I said…”

“I know what you said. You might have everything you need, but you don’t have EVERYONE you need, s’ogbo?”

Carol’s ears burned at that statement. No, she did not gbọ́, she did not gbọ́ at all!

_

Her aunt tore open the cap of the bottle, almost as if she was fighting with the bottle of oil itself, put some on her fingers and drew a sign of the cross multiple times on Carol’s forehead before Carol could even react.

Carol opened her mouth to say something really disrespectful but she decided to keep quiet; she was puzzled when she saw her aunt draw the sign of the cross with the oil on her own forehead too.

“Aunty?”

“Hmm?”

“Why did you put the oil on your forehead too? Is someone missing in your life?”

Her aunt noticed sarcasm in Carol’s voice but chose to ignore; instead she said “mind your own, let me mind mine.”

Carol wondered who was not minding her business here; Aunty Sewa had made her husbandless status – which was totally fine by Carol, by the way – the perfect excuse to seek out many “pastors.”

At that point in time Carol remembered that one “prophet”, the one her aunt said he’d gotten an instruction that would lead Carol to her God-ordained husband; but first Carol must buy five litres of petrol and bring it to the prayer centre.

Apparently, the fuel was supposed to fuel her soon-to-be husband’s desires wherever he was on the face of the planet, and bring him to her.

Ah. O ga o.

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